Friday, July 27, 2007

[fiction friday]

This Week’s Challenge: Use the word afoot in dialogue.

And here is my effort...

"Afoot..." she whispered.

"Huh? What's that, Julie? Did you say, 'on foot?'"


"What? What are you talking about? What games?"

"Unhappy woman."

"Are you unhappy? Are you trying to tell me something, Julie?"

"Meet Henry."

"Who is this Henry guy? Julie. Julie! Who is this Henry guy?!"

"No, all my Canada."

"Is Henry in Canada? Are you going to Canada?"



", black beard. Where is he?"

"Does this Henry guy have a black beard? I thought you didn't like facial hair."

"Bounds hounds. Hehehehe"

"Why are you laughing? Julie, does Henry have a dog? Why are you thinking about Henry? Tell me more about him. Do you like him?"

"But this is nothing...nothing."

"So you do! Have you been with this guy?"

"Down in the foul slime."

"So you have!"

"In our sitting room in Baker street."

"What? Where is Baker Street? You have a place with this guy?"

"South America"

"South America? I thought you said Canada. When were you in South America? Did you and Henry live there? Julie. Julie?! Wake up!"


"Who is Henry?"

"What? Why are you asking me about the lawn boy? Go back to bed."

"Lawn boy? When did we get a lawn boy?"

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Anonymous said...

Love the concept and the last line makes me go hummm...I thought that he was being a little paranoid, filling in the blanks during her sleep-talk but I guess there are some things that he doesn't know.

I love this kind of stuff. Keeps me wondering.

paisley said...

very cute... i wans'nt sure till the very end what was up... very funny...lawn boy....

pjd said...

I wasn't sure if this was sleep-talking or someone on one of those itty bitty cell phone ear things that you can't see and they just look like they're mumbling to themselves. But it was fun, and the last line is a kicker. I know one guy who's not getting any sleep tonight!

lissa said...

I like the end - a little funny

Maria said...

This is totally off topic I guess but I do remember in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure one of them saying "something is afoot at the Circle K" -- I think, anyway....