I am not really a fan of the elastic-comfort-waistband on trousers, but I must admit that there are some benefits to owning a pair of low-fashion high-function pants. The elastic-waistband pants, also known as “Action Pants,” are the less frumpy essential in the wardrobe of the guy or gal who wants to be ready for any kind of activity in a flash.
At this day and age, there is stuff to be done, and we need to have clothing that will facilitate such activity. You certainly don’t want to waste your precious time fumbling with bulky buttons and sticky zippers. Need to dash to the restroom to take a big dump? Action Pants are there for you. Running home at lunchtime to get a quickie in with the wife or significant other? Action Pants at your service. Going out after work to the buffet and then meeting the boys later for drinks? Only the Action Pants waistband will comfortably allow for such gluttony.
Different than “Mom-jeans,” true Action Pants CANNOT be fabricated from any type of denim fabric. In fact, if you own any type of denim pants with any length of elastic in the waistband, please go now and douse those dork jeans with gasoline and throw a match on them. Crisis averted.
So what are acceptable Action Pants? Some Action Pants closely resemble the more casual brother, “Sweatpants,” and are made of sturdy nylon or cotton fabric. Fall and winter Action Pants can be lined to encourage leg warmth during the cooler months. Spring and summer models are usually light and breezy and can be fashioned from nylon, light cotton, or linen fabric. Whatever the fabric choice, however, the true mark of Action Pants is that they have the modality to be worn on casual Friday at the office and to the Softball game later that night. You might have even referred to the pair in your wardrobe as the “Dressy Sweats.”
While it is true that Action Pants are a long loved and utilized companion of the geriatric crowd, you need not own a stash of Adult Diapers to enjoy the benefits of Action Pants. Friday is almost here; folks…run to your closets now and shake the wrinkles out of your well-loved pants. I know for years you’ve worn them at home and in the dark in shame, but I am here now to liberate you and your pants.
Know Action Pants. Wear Action Pants. Love Action Pants. Be free.
2 weeks ago
9 comments:
I love my Action Pants.
I wear trendy yoga pants as my Action Pants. I have several pairs, and they are soooo comfortable not to mention versatile. Not just for yoga, but for cleaning (as if I clean!), lounging, going to the gym, exam cram sessions, pj bottoms, everything! Plus they are cute and make my ass look great.
Ooooo, SG...I wear trendy yoga APs too for the same exact activities! And for the same exact reasons!
No, really...next to my smile, my back-side is my best feature (or is it my biggest feature?). And if a person is into the "junk in the trunk," they might like to take a gander at me in my yoga APs.
Same with me!! My bootie is my signature. We must compare one day!! =)
YAPs (Yoga Action Pants)are my APs of choice too.
Do velour action pants count? b/c I have some of those.
Velour Action Pants definitely work...it's borderline Mafia attire, but those guys set the bar for action. You can't go wrong with Velour Action Pants.
I also have the matching action zip-up sweatshirt. it's a full outfit. but it does look soprano-esque. so does my belly.
Selene may or may not get an opportunity to see it this weekend...
Oooooo! An Action Outfit! That has a lot of possiblilities...
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