The Memorial

Just wanted to let everyone know that we held a nice memorial service for OIAM even though there is a question about her being completely dead. Rumor has it that she is involved in the blogger re-location program.

I won’t give you all the details of the service, but here are some highlights:

The guys from the East Coast brought the flowers – all tulips. The tulips were beautiful! PJD and Maria gave a nice eulogy…short and sweet as it was a haiku. After the service we ate tacos and a nice Mexican soup (thank you Maria – delicious). Mimi provided the entertainment (pinball, of course).

Things started to fall apart, however, after the DJ – some guy named Horace – had a few too many drinks. He got into it with this guy hobbling around in a cast and pulling a huge bouncy slide behind him (it was very strange). Mr. Bouncy Slide apparently didn’t like all the drunken name-dropping Horace was doing, and in a rage Mr. BS was chasing Horace around and trying to kick Horace with the casted foot.

Another gal in a cowboy hat, very weepy, was passing out flyers for some kind of “ladies” party. Then, as a deep-voiced husky woman – Rudith – kept trying to console the party gal in a too-close-for-comfort way, an unusually persistent overnight delivery guy was trying to cut in on the action.

As all this was going down, some guy-member of a “bar band” dropped the slinkiest “yam” in the girl’s toilet, and the stink was beginning to permeate the place. Party gal got a whiff, barfed on overnight delivery guy and Rudith. At that same moment, Mr. BS (still chasing Horace) ran by and slipped in the barf, grabbed the nearby drapes to break his fall, and pulled them down on himself and on this crying “Cowboy” model/restaurant owner guy. They collided, Mr. BS, drapes, and all, knocking Cowboy guy out cold. Mr. BS broke his other leg in the collision.

A drunk Russian Dentist was first on the scene in an apparent attempt to help in the chaos, but instead he just stood there and yelled at everyone to, “Stop crying like baby!”

The cops arrived shortly thereafter, and a few of us were able to sneak out the back as they were busting in the front door to the place.

After that, all hell broke loose. It was mayhem. A very fitting end to OIAM, really.