Monday, September 12, 2005

Crappyglue

This just in: superglue is not super. It’s not even good. It’s really more like “crappyglue.” I don’t even know why I have that crap in my home except that having it gives me reassurance; if something breaks, I will be able to attempt to glue it back together before eventually I throw the broken thing away.

On Saturday, I found a little kid toy that was almost chomped clean in half by Champ . Great, I thought. This toy is a good candidate for that special glue.

So I removed the “push-pin” lid from the glue bottle, but I was unable to squeeze out the pin drop sized amount of glue that I needed to fix the toy. That’s okay, I’ll just apply a little more pressure on the bottle of glue, I thought.

Of course you know what happened – glue gushed out of the bottle (and this happens every time; it’s like having clowns in a bottle – when you think there is nothing else in there, more comes out). This time, though, my hands were entirely drenched in glue.

The situation was not good. For a moment, all of my fingers were stuck together on my left hand, and the toy was stuck to my fingers in my right hand.

By sheer willpower I was able to free the fingers and the toy, but my fingers on my left hand were beginning to crust over. I couldn’t bend one finger, and my ring was glued to my skin.

I abandoned the fix the toy idea.

Does this glue ever work? I mean, does it glue things that we intend to glue? I’ve heard that many doctors will now fasten some wounds with superglue rather than with stitches, and I am guessing that someone had a similar experience to mine to figure out how great superglue works on skin.

Other than closing a wound and gluing a hard hat to a steel beam so some weirdo can dangle precariously over a vat of human waste, are there any good uses for this glue?

6 comments:

said...

I used to hate super glue.

Now that I've found QuickTite(R) my troubles are over.

http://www.loctite.com/int_henkel/loctite_us/index.cfm?pageid=486&layout=2

It's the gel that keeps it from running everywhere.

They've put the usual little tube into a convenient plastic reservoir to catch those old-type tube explosions. In fact, they've spent more on building a container to make gluing easy then they have on the glue itself.

Friend, try QuickTite(R). You'll be amazed at the difference.

Available at Michael's Jo Ann's and other fine craft stores.

Selene said...

I have that Crappyglue too. The only thing it has ever worked on is gluing a torn fingernail.

Remember the Lladro Angel at Marillis Wilbur's house. Remember how I decapitated it when I knocked the candlestick into it's neck. Marillis told me not to worry, that she had already been decapped once before - "That's what glue's for," she said. And then, "Besides, them's just things, girl, I can't take 'em with me when I die."

bluesugarpoet said...

With claims such as, "Spill proof design keeps hands clean," and "Improved dispensing control and accuracy," how can I go wrong with QuickTite(R)?

Thank you, friend, for introducing me to QuickTite(R). It's the glue I'll be sticking with for a long time.

Buy now while supplies last. And for a limited time, with every order you'll get a free set of knives that never need sharpening!

Seriously, though, I will be checking out QT when I'm down at the fabric store.

PJD said...

A clerk at REI once told me that serious backpackers will sometimes coat the soles of their feet in super glue (and let it dry before putting socks on!) in order to get a second skin of sorts to prevent blisters. I've not tried it. I'm not saying I recommend it...

Jane D. said...

That is crazy!!

Another use might be for those guys who might need a little extra protection when Rosie Palm gets a little rough.

PJD said...

One would think that a product called QuickTite would be more appropriate for that kind of usage.